There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
i really did not know you could catch crabs from a sofa until now
there were no ball for pong so he bought cat toys..... they had bells in them
Those foam number one hands, are the BEST socks.
it was really awkward meeting your mom for the first time while i was still wearing the condom we were using.
So I saw the nuva ring just lying on the counter at Planned Parenthood...did u know it's just a ring? I could go to the Dollar tree buy a plastic bracelet and shove it up there instead.
You do that. Then go have lots of unprotected with your harem of booty calls and see how that works out for you.
The fool I made of myself at the Ugly Christmas Sweater party last night was surpassed this morning when I walk of shamed 6 miles at 7am with one mysterious wet leg and no pants on. I think my mom saw me and waved.
You tried tipping the cashier at Cook Out by shoving a dollar bill down his shirt and yelling "Magic Mike"
Pictures of drunk me in a bike helmet are like McDonald's collectible toys. There's sooo many, but NO ONE has seen all of them.
I would really just like to get laid somewhere that's not on a bathroom floor at this point in my life
I just woke up naked next to a GetGo sandwich and I can hear my cats are eating my combos. So that's my life.
I may or may not be setting up an encounter with a foot fetishist just because I'm curious.
Success! We fucked roommates!
Just googled myself and a bunch of boob shots of me came up. Apparently my phone automatically uploaded them to my google plus.
Please google me ASAP and ensure I corrected this...
admittedly, geting that drunk in front of my last two exes wasnt a good idea
probably didn't help that you cheated on them with each other either
Randomize
