Thong +tight pants =hungry butt. Not a good look on big women! Walmart sucks.
Martha Stewart would most definitely roll a great joint.
I think vodka calistinics prior to and during beer olympics was a bad idea
I woke up this morning with gum gluing my ass cheeks together..
I can't decide if I actually want to know or not..
sorry i was making out with matt didn't mean for it to sound like that. there was no tone
there should be a new saying, don't text and tongue
There are empty beer cans all over and the go-kart is missing. I need it for my halloween costume.
Just got back from fathers day breakfast. So hungover i couldn't eat so i just slipped my food in my pockets and threw it out while i puked in the bathroom.
I'm taking stock of m life as of right now and my Friday night plans are to drink a 30 rack by myself so I can have a tv stand when it is finished
well, obviously he didn't fuck me for my strong moral fiber.
Looks like a took a video of myself beating off and passed out last night. I'm classy.
My goal for the weekend: procure a blowjob using only stern glances, hand gestures, and crudely-drawn stick figures.
I'm the one who said we should take things slow. I'm also the one who forced him into the back on my car so we could have sex.
Yeah, we got drunk and stole road signs.
I have a mild substance abuse problem, but I'm still a functioning member of society. America.
I may just have to resign myself to life in flats. He's a sexy little chipmunk that worships me.
Randomize
