I Think it is all interconnected. Emma caused most of the nakedness
Did they have a limo or was i just stoned?
can we get together and have a vodka water gun fight? i need to get som intense excersise/alcohol
I'm high and craving hash browns from McDonalds. Please pick me up. I also would like a hug and a supportive pat on the back when you get here. Thanks.
Its two in the afternoon. McDonalds don't sell hash browns at 2 in the afternoon. Whore. The hug I can provide however.
I got back at him the only way I knew how, by hooking up with the guy he hates from their rival fraternity.
That's actually a fantastic idea... The kinky sex dungeon will be vastly improved by the addition of a lightsaber
That bitch makes my crazy look like a walk in the park with cotton candy
You were, but he disappeared after you said you wanted him to get you pregnant so you'd have a child by the time the Boy Meets World sequel starts
This is that think about life weed. Thank god I'm in American lit this semester. I can actually write papers in this vat of introspective stoned.
That BJ in the bathroom was definitely worth the $20 cover.
I just ate cottage cheese and went to the gym at 6 this morning...the things i'll do because I might get naked in front of a new boy
Like a gentleman I waited until you were done vomming to start my Big Mac.
I met a guy last night who bought me a book on Amazon at the bar and then we had sex. Boners for books is a thing. Boom.
I showered three hours ago and yet feel the need for another one already. This is my day.
just learned i can hear my fish chewing his food WHILE HES IN HIS BOWL. im going to have to call you back.
Randomize