I Once took so much Ecstacy that I tried to hug a fire.
Thanks for the menagerie of condoms on my desk
It's the use of SAT words like that which make me want to use them on you
I think the fact that my first kiss is now in a porno says a lot about why my life is the way it is
I don't know why I've never thought to take my bong into the bathtub before.
You've been drinking wine and eating bacon all afternoon. HOW IS THAT DOING GOOD?!?!
Don't smoke out front when you get home there's gasoline involved I'll tell you later
Fake an illness. Her and her friends are like the female version of guys who wear tapout shirts
donating our bodies to science does not justify what were doing to them.
Also, I might need your help for a prank involving a hand puppet, a coke bottle, double-sided tape, and my dick...
It's like rock paper scissors. Cold showers and smoking beat hangovers.
My costume for the end of the world party was a success. Everyone in the ER thought I was there because I got hit by a car when it was actually from alcohol poisoning.
Yes... I'll kill two birds with one crazy ecstacy filled night.
I hate to stick you with the friend but I did all the work.
This is like a walk of shame down memory lane.
I kinda realized titty fucking is purely for our enjoyment, they dont really get much out of it, except for a guy sitting on them and and a dick bouncing of their chin
Randomize
