I am too high to leave where I am...And they are listening to Stained. This is my living hell.
and then she yelled "im going to fuck the next guy that walks by me". so ya thats how i lost my virginity
i rewarded my self with tacobell for not throwing up on any one. MISTAKE
I'll wind up on his doorstep with a confused "oh you live here" expression, a feigned ankle injury and a seemingly fortunately placed bottle of tequila. I don't care what it takes: HIS MOUTH WILL BE ON MOUTH.
Come on Nikki god gave you a vagina for a reason, so you could tell guys what kind of shots to buy you
Ahahhahaha I'm not that stupid but then again I thought cabo was in Africa until yesterday
Alright, who started the "how long till dereck gets deported from Australia" pool? I want in on that.
I decided not to eat, and then this man was my fairy " don't black out" godmother
Not blacking out at our finals party is my Everest
I'm just gonna go have sex with whom ever is in the men's room.
actually there are like 49038098 people in the bathroom for no reason. Singing My Heart Will Go On and pseudo fighting.
But if I live with you I'll help pay rent. Only if you promise no 50 shades of what the fuck internet hookups
Welp... sober this am and I still have a parrot.
thanks for not wanting to stay all night or talk or anything, nice to have a fuck buddy who really doesnt take the buddy part serious
I'm all about the fuck
Did you guys just have three hour sex? You both stopped and restarted texting me at the same time
If I were to say yes, would we still be friends?
Randomize
