The last thing I remeber was convincing you to hide in the fridge, and then taking everything out and you not fitting.
Random question, how's your gag reflex these days
I cant remeber how long i've been laying here...it could be 10 minutes to a fucking day
i kinda regret how quickly i gave it up to him, but i just wanted the regular fucking to begin soon. ah we made good memories.
oh awks just saw the head of medical staff who I punched the bottle of wine at
There's just something about sucking a flaccid dick that makes me feel so calm. Like a baby cow..
Well we're gonna drink when we get home and I just invited the cab driver to play beer pong
I'm sorry for peeing on your door. But it was your decision to open it.
Bring single women, or taken women who are unhappy with their relationships, or women who are happy with their relationships but have low moral standards, or women who just like to remove clothing when drunk (relationship status is unimportant for this option)
I had a moment while I was smoking where I was looking at these palm trees and I knew how dr Seuss came up with his characters.
Where did this racoon skin hat, stop sign and bag full of tacos come from?
Narnia or $5 pitcher night either way
the fact that i already established a hook up buddy for thanksgiving break is genius
He asked us to wake him up with a strobe light. We had it going in front of his face full power for half and hour and he didn't even blink.
Dude you filled up a protein shake mixer with White Russians so you didn't have to keep coming upstairs.
There is no way entering a gas station bathroom memorializing an alien abduction in rural New Hampshire is a good idea.
Randomize
