We can't ever have kids because there's a chance that they'll end up just like us.
I may also break bread with strippers. Because it is passover.
He just kept petting my ear and informing me that I wasn't one of the guys
according to the random from alabama i slept with last night i kept saying "poor lil tink tink" over and over in my sleep
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Also, did that cop draw hearts on everyone's hands last night?
Ummm I just broke my no puke streak at church
I also love beards. The playoffs are like christmas for my vagina.
Sorry, all I could picture was you jamming your dick into a lemon.
It blows my mind that pandora doesn't have an : I want to lay in bed in the dark and be sad and cold and eat frozen mangos and chipotle all day station
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
its like my brain is a tree and you are those little cookie elves
So here's my pathetic thought of the day: what does it smell like to be sober?
I think John will remember that birthday for a while. I'm still dying at the fact a stripper was hunting me down.
Quick question. If you break the bathroom sink off the wall from fucking on it, can you claim it on your homeowner's insurance as a 'natural disaster'?
I honestly have no desire to wear clothes around you
I have that affect on people
I have a lot of money, and no morals. shots on you when you get here.
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