she was bad bro. like...id rather put my dick in a blender. twice.
it's a well known fact that sluts are attracted to bright colors
american apparel?
try lime green
i told her that i loved her pillow breasts and then she asked me if i wanted to motor boat them. so yea, i do need the room tonite.
he is a creepy guy.
yea thats what heroine does to ppl.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I did my dad and i had to keep going back there to pick up coffee
please read the first 4 words of that text and consider punctuation
i was told that i was found face down in a plate of ketchup at the dinner table
Ps I don't think it counts as being open minded if you didn't know he was missing a leg until you had already started making out.
What's standard gratutity for someone having a miscarriage on stage at a strip club? It's important.
My pubes were yanked out by the root when they got caught in the condom. I think it's time for a bikini wax.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
three guys with a tattoo of the Walmart rollback smiley holding up a middle finger on their ass=free drinks in every bar
I swear to god if you eat that last piece of pie while I'm gone I will never speak to you again. I'm so serious.
So, were you planning on telling me you left your panties in my glovebox??
Is talking to an iron man poster a good or bad indicator that you've been drinking too much?
Guess who just set half their backyard on fire.
Please tell me youre joking.
Nope. on the brightside though, im really gonna quit smoking this time.
Long story short I ended up getting choked out by a really hot guy in the girls bathroom at a bar last night
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