Marg and I just meaowed the nat anthem. I was tenor.
'm tripping baaaaaaaaaaaaaaas
After they won there was a guy outside Magee Hospital yelling "name your kid Sidney"... that guy may or may not have been me.
you won't ask to borrow his earbuds because you think it's gross, but you'll have sex with him?
I just got hit on by my highschool french teacher. I need to stop going to this bar.
It was like god placed me in his bed and said," here's your shot girl. Don't mess this up." And I looked at god and laughed in his face.
Remember that mom/daughter stripper team? Well i just met the ex husband/father in AA. WOW!!!! WOW....
Just from watching vine I come to conclusion that all pornstars are dog hoarders.
"I'm not drinking any more tonight." As I dipped my quesadilla in a shot of tequila....then eats it
The problem is that you are trying to hold on to some dignity. Let it go. I hope your rash gets better.
I named my Roomba after my pot dealer. I have a problem, don't i?
Keep in mind this was 2012... YOLO was a very new concept.
its 2pm and were already starting beer pong...its gonna be a good night
I have to start drinking water I have a drug test to fail at 1:40
I got subtly pornographic with a lollipop while we were talking and he got flustered and started to blush. If he’s not interested after that I need to turn in my vagina card.
I love you so much and not just because your dick is perfect
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