Let's start a violent farting gang. We can do walkbys.
he came faster then a bring it on movie goes to dvd
Just found out my brother beats off to Lauren Conrad. the Hills will never be the same.
someone made her a trophy at 4 in the morning and presented it to her in the bathtub
Sweet. I'm actually coaching my work study into a 4-girl orgy so dinner was kinda important. Yes, I'm the best boss ever.
You got a blow job by a girl whose nickname is "the terrible tooth"?! You are a brave man.
Well we're either getting a bunny or I'm getting you pregnant in about 12 days.
All I know is when I checked my phone this morning google translate was open with "help the cow ate my robot" translated to French
I'm more worried that you thought licking a pole on Bourbon street would turn me on
I saw the attitude and didn't even try. Line of the night from one guy who talked with them for a while said, "I don't meet you standards. I have a job and would treat you well." She was blank faced.
Apparently asking your girlfriends roommate for a hand job when u craw into the wrong bed after a bottle of rum is "bad form".
If you saw or spoke to me yesterday can you message me. Trying to make a timeline of the day I was too drunk to remember
He fucked me so well and hard that the couch slid into the Christmas tree. I had to pull branches out of my hair.
Did you see her happy birthday to emily on facebook? The gist of it is like: hey emily you almost died at birth im glad you didn't. love mom.
When they said they were gonna tattoo each other's gamer tags on their asses, I knew I no longer had a boyfriend.
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