How do you wash franks red hot sauce, whip cream, grapejuice and shame out of silk?
I would just throw it away. You cant just wash out shame, it has to soak for like a month.
And by hung out you mean you were in my bed for 5 minutes while your penis was in my mouth.
He said he wanted to make me his Twinkie, "filled with his delicious cream." ABSOLUTELY 100% NO YOU MAY NOT REPEAT ****NOT**** GIVE HIM MY NUMBER EVER EVER EVER. Please confirm receipt and full comprehension of this message.
110% paid for our cab with a lap dance
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Wow I didn't even consider the possibility of him having ED. I'm gaining so many life experiences from dating an older man
I just sang country roads at the top of my lungs with my cab driver. Tonight was a success.
Can we just focus for a minute on the fact that I HAD MY FIRST LESBIAN ENCOUNTER.
Right. How rude of me to inform you that you're going to be an aunt.
Wow it must be so difficult to be as popular as you are and smoke as much weed as you do
Ask me who hasn't showered since Sunday and just got cruised at the gas station on his way to work. I'm a terrible gay.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
By the way, anytime you want to go toe to toe on Doggystyle lyrics just let me know!
Who is this? Did we just become best friends?!
My mom just called hysterical. She and her sister found my dead grandma's vibrator.
The apple don't fall far from that tree.
You know how I said I hit my head so hard I saw two of him and tried to make out with both? Well, it turns out he has a twin.
99% of the contents of my handbag are ketchup packets and condoms. I feel that says a lot about me as a person.
There's a dude wearing a banana suit at the house across the street....
I didn’t spend $100 for a wax to sit here and listen to you FT your brother to complain about how bad the Jets are.
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