So i just found out i replied to my room mates craigslist ad. Akward
Max was wondering if he could trade you sex for the use of your jumper cables
Question. Will thrown up fruit loops go down the shower drain?
how do you say happy birthday to the guy that almost got you pregnant? i cant just write the same thing as last year.
Would you have sex with a guy wearing a Batman mask?
It's all hypothetical, I don't have a Batman mask... yet...
Someone shat in our tub last night. I'm not pointing fingers but you priors make you a prime suspect.
I am about to embark upon a south Boston wedding....
Hydrate.
If your nipples ruin my wedding photos I will kill you.
there's a drunk hobo under the bridge wearing a jester hat and screaming at women
Do you think I need to report to HR that the intern and I had butt sex?
all i know is that i woke up at 12:00 am in a shower with egg shell in my hair. i am 90% sure you are responsible.
Im 76 percent sure I took a fully clothed shower last night.
I’ve gotta be honest, I didn’t expect to have sex. I didn’t shave... anything. You couldn’t have been impressed.
Can I use your boat
Also, what’s the deal with international water? Do they have signs out there like a city does or do I need a map?
WTH is going on? It’s the middle of the night
How’s big weiner McGee?
I’m going to ask you one last time to call him Matt and he’s fine thank you very much
Randomize
