I regularly think about how cool your nickname is
Is it bad that my booty call's snoring was more interesting than the sex we had last night?
at a party and just made O-H-I-O out of dicks and vajayjays...i hope someone took a pic i was too busy (; GO BUCKS!!!
Would we rather be in rehab with the drug addicts or the girls with low self esteem?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't really want to write this paper. It's the last one of the semester - I need to savor the feeling of procrastination.
I probably should have cut it off when he started putting queso on my nipples, but within ten minutes I was a self-serve burrito bar.
Yeah, she tried to drown her but then they hooked up.
filling out my bracket based on schools with ppl I've hooked up with
Check out this gay circle: I've now hooked up with my ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend, and most recently my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend's ex-fling.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If anyone ask I'm rushing for brotherhood, not so that this bartender will suck my dick
Ya he's alive. Apparently he's been drinking Naty and listening to Unbreak My Heart on repeat all day.
The bellhop gave us weed in our keycard envelop. We went down to tip him and he apparently never gets that so he just gave us more weed. Kentucky is strange
Fuck Sunday funday. Fuck real pants. Fuck the sun. Fuck Jameson. Fuck my life. Yes, I am hungover as shit sitting in my office eating bacon.
The original plan involved fireworks and a lot more dildos but the new one is still okay.
I woke up at 3:30 this morning to pee. Luckily, I didn't have to travel far as I was asleep in my CLOSET on my yoga mat. Good news is I had a pillow...
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