so... another position just opened up(704) Oh really?(704) Is it John's?(704) Or did you find a new way to take a penis?
so that wasnt chicken after all
She said she could kiss it, just not put it in her mouth. Because that would be cheating..
I'm full of awesome ideas
Yesss you are. Im full of confusion. I keep finding peanut butter on my legs...
As soon as the judge read that I rear ended the car from getting roadhead he chuckled. You know he's been there before.
All I know is that it's pretty damn mean to put a glass wall in a bar.
Handcuffed. To. Steering. Wheel. Fuck.
Is it wrong that I want to take the baby bump in her facebook pictures as "meal-ticket"?
I blacked out at the bar, and blcked in getting a handjob on a roller coaster. Sober me is jealous of drunk me.
Depending upon how the Sox game progresses, I'll either cry on the bar or fuck someone tonight...
It's like a party bus, but there's a glass, airtight wall separating the driver from the passengers, and once everyone's on, they pump vaporized THC into the cabin.
I'm smoking a bowl with matches and a candle while my mother washes dishes downstairs. I thought adulthood was supposed to be different.
Our first order of business as new roommates was to test the sex acoustics of our rooms. I need a new box spring.
I gotta give him props though, I've never been propositioned for sex via flash mob.
Is it sacrilegious to take tequila shots on Saint Patrick's day?
Randomize
