Being alone has allowed me to flourish into a complete weirdo
I'm wearing a childsize birthday hat and a bib. I am the def of sex appeal rite now
everything is bigger in texas. Including my drinking problem.
just won a stolen shopping cart in a dance off in a parking lot.
Wouldn't pinatas filled with coke be awesome idea for cinco de mayo?
you handed me your bra at the bar and said 'hold my purse'
i'm not a hellocoptur, but youer in a dorm ans im un a dorm
all i wanted was to be slutty. now i'm meeting him for drinks tomorrow because he woke up before i had a chance to sneak out and was too polite to say no
She has puke in her hair, is missing a shoe and is now crying. People trust her to be their child's teacher
Yeah I was convinced everyone knew I was high. Time was passing way too slowly for anyone NOT to notice.
I'm drinking vodka. Get ready for my famous "come over" mass snapchats
All I know is that I have a black eye and an extra $200 in my wallet. Other than that, clueless.
The time stamp on this text message is reason enough alone to not leave me unsupervised
What's your opinion on eating ass? Just looking for a yes or no
Come over. We have half a bottle of jumbo champagne left and no boyfriends to slow us down
Randomize
