We just all danced like dinosaurs in the center of the dance floor.
Taljing aboutpenisrs w gerruly ska pops
At what point should shame kick in? Realising I had a one night stand with a man engaged or realising I am that man's wedding photographer?
Go on vacation with her and forget to pack pants. I did that once and it worked like a charm.
should i go to class, or party with a mariachi band?
meriachi band is very tempting, do they have dos equis?
No one parties like Jon. He once stole a cops hat, ran like the wind, partied all night with it, and dropped it off at the station the next day with a box of donuts as an appology.
Going to a professional golf course at 2am to throw the flag poles like javelins
I found him in his pink and white boxer out side the dorm hall and the only thing he said was "it wouldn't let me in"
'go have sex with her' ddoes not count as wingman
I really dont wanna go to a traffic light party. I have nothing red to pretend I'm taken with. Without something red my "my girlfriend is away in the mines" story wont work.
In other news my pubic hair is covered in glitter.
Honestly, I want an afternoon of mild abuse, mixed with face fucking and general molestation that turns in love making, laughter and cinnamon toast crunch naked in bed.
People trash cargo shorts, but I'm like, sorry I had room for beers and you didn't.
I don't think it's a coincidence that the day I just happen to do the splits at the gym I come back with 7 guys' phone numbers.
Do you think he will let me wear my neck fan while he throws my back out?
Please shut the fuck up.
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