im at a bar with my dad last night and he got hit on more that I did
So J keeps drinking his last bit of drink, then spitting it out and drinks it again. Savor the flavor?
while 90% of the female population goes to worship a fictional character tonight at midnight, I will be taking advantage of having the bars ALL TO MYSELF.
I really shouldn't have to apologize. It was your own damn fault for opening a tab at the bar and telling me about it.
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Thanks for gettin' me home, killa. Have no IDEA how I woke up pants-less on the bathroom floor at 4a.m. You're like a big, angry guardian angel.
Someone fucked up, the stop Kony day is on 4/20,
All I know is that your reaction after this date with him was "I think I did cocaine" so I'm sold on this boy
We invented this drinking game where you pick and random video and drink for every misspelled word in the youtube comments. It did not end well.
if drunk means calling me and asking to borrow the game of life at 2am then I think you were drunk
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Don't tell me 'the Fonzie' doesn't work. Went to see Shakespeare high and gave the sign to the dude playing Macbeth. Now at a cast party getting blown. All hail the Fonz.
sweet Jesus, who thought 13 martinis was a good idea? 11 was probably sufficient.
He gave me an extra phone charger for the other side of the bed the other night. Is that love?
I've sent two unsolicited tit pictures in less than 24 hours. I'm the female version of a fuckboy.
Oh please. Preoccupy yourself with my penis.
She's the other freshman on this drunken voyage
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