Did you see 7 ppl got hurt at Talladaga?
Did they get their mullets stuck in an engine?
Dude, 1 prime defect in the snuggie- you can't fuck someone discreetly under a snuggie. No way no how
I'll name the documentary, "The Adventures of Megan's Vagina"
oh yeah I know that guy. he's legit. slept in my closet a few times
There is literally a guy in my class with a gallon of water and a trophy.
I think they can follow the trail of blood to my house if they have a problem with me taking a dip in their hot tub last night b4 stepping on a broken bottle
Well I tried to call you. I was convinced my body was made of wood. But the Xmas lights in my room helped
I respect the size of her balls.
Yeah but I don't respect the size of her anything else.
so hungover. i just puked at the sight of the beer emoticon you sent me.
Just had a guy try to pull the maraca out of my shirt with his teeth... Wtf
I want to wear Christmas sweaters with you.
Someone should make a valentines day card that says "I like the way you continuously consume thc with no concept of a limit other than drug supply" Because I'd send that to you.
I just did a shot of Jameson and two shots of cuervo. Note: this is the moment things went down hill
All I need is to get out and get laid
Yeah mom sounds like a good idea! Now send that message to the person it was ment for
Live it up bro, they're always so surprised to find out you use magnums, being such a tiny man and all. It's a good thing.
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