So he sent me a text that said "say hi to your vajayjay for me"
Was there any message he wanted you to relay to your asshole?
I swear god or herbie drove my car home
The google font looked peculiar last night, but then up close I realized it was just dry vomit.
I'd invite him but there's too many people who have fucked me going already
If you're trying to subtly tell me that I look like Connie Chung, just stop it. I already know.
just so you know... i was wasted last night, but the evening is coming back to me in flashes... i made you eat gravy last night, didn't i?
sticking your hands in the toilet to wash your face is not acceptable. ever. i don't care how drunk you are.
its friday night, im aone in my apartment and eating 2 year expired canned fruit, naked. i'm not single or anything..
I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser.
but we were going camping. it only made sense to bring the 6 ft bong
although steph and I had 3 bottles of wine by that point and watched an opera that featured a black dildo so anything was possible really
Yea not today, I ending up taking a shit behind a tree last night.
I'm sorry I peed on myself in front of your boy toy. You should tell him I'm usually not that trashy. It was nice meeting him tho..
Well I'm nervous now about the consequences of letting you loose
It's a big decision, I respect that you need to think about it.
I love you.
Bad choice
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