return my video game
Ok I love you more. To infumty and beyong.
Fuck their fairy tale bullshit. I shall ruin it. With a few thrusts of my cock.
A good Q tip ear swabbing is better than bad sex.
you dont remember trying to break dance in the middle of the casino floor on ur own throw up?
oh that explains alot.
how was your night?
well, i just purchased 'sorry for being a drunk whore' cupcakes. how do you think my night was?
I'm so high I just tried to eat a hair tie thinking it was one of my pretzels.
i woke up to find out i shared my bed with a full, open can of natty light last night and didnt spill it. then i drank it for breakfast.
He's only a little bit crosseyed.
I think this is one situation where "a little bit" doesn't mean much.
He screamed for everyone to hide, unplugged the music, then talked to the cop. Last I saw he was high fiving him...
He's the fucking cop whisperer.
Somebody left a mini pitcher in the bathroom. Think its safe?
Let me get this straight, you're telling me to lower my standards? Even though last week you told me I don't have any..?
I think he knows I took a picture of him. Why I don't get punched in the face more often is anyone's guess.
That's the 2nd med student that has had his tongue in my butthole, what gives.
After 25 beers and 3 shots my best friend thought it would be an amazing idea to get his dick pierced. We are on our way.
Randomize