oh my god i am going to vomit. and little burgers wearing crowns are going to come out.
omg kevin jonas gave his bride a glass slipper..could he be any gayer then he is now
he is so gay. he makes clay aiken look straight. what is wrong with the lady that married him? kevin must be envious of her balls
Sitting next to a girl in the computer cluster who just googled syphilis symtoms, started crying & got up and left. My life suddenly seems better.
so I'm in athletic shorts, a suit jacket and I'm still drunk at 6:30am at the last leg of relay for life
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My cousin had a baby so we have to look at it. Apparently the event is byob
they came at us with fireworks while we were skinny dipping in her jacuzzi at 4 am...
That's exactly how my pussy feels when I shave it. Like a cross between a naked mole rat and a newborn child. Embrace it.
I've friend zoned this boy hard. I made him change my nipple rings before he went home.
I sat down next to him and my bra just unhooked itself
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
To the person who put the glitter on my ceiling fan...fuck you
I thought I would be a proper lady and put my spare panties in a ziplock
Ok, not to minimize the significance of that beautiful anecdote from your childhood, but here's a video of my penis.
Masturbating to death wouldn't be a terrible way to go. If you die tonight, I'll know how it went down. Promise not to tell your family.
she has no right to get mad at us for drinking during the wedding. she's the one that chose the bridesmaid dresses with pockets.
I can't wait to see you & have espresso-fueled sex
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