I hope you get the herp and dife. The emd.
it took everything i had not to yell out "your name means death in german!"
just won a stolen shopping cart in a dance off in a parking lot.
What's the point of having 3 fuck buddies when their periods all seem to sync up
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
basically at this point ill snort whatever you put in front of me and just hope
Also, I found out tonight a major plus for being female is you can accidentally call the hot bartender sweet tits and she won't get mad.
Morning yack off the fire escape. Girl walking by was mortified. Gooooooooo Ducks!!
I want to be you.
Bring fortys. we have the duct tape. its onnn mothafuckaaaa
You don't want to cheat on your husband, you just want to fuck someone who isn't him.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Fuck. I have to get my shit together by lunch. Mission impossible.
You were fine, but your knee injury definitely came from interpretive dancing like a gay fairy with lead wings all around the Mission St BART. Everyone thought you were on drugs.
The only thing I had in my freezer before today was patron and cheese.
I just drove my booty call to his booty call, if that isn't spreading the love, I don't know what is.
I fit in backpacks. BOOM HERE I AM! Like a stripper from a cake.
As a paramedic, it's completely unacceptable to black out on a monday. I cant handle 3 dollar shot night.
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