So the hot 23 year old i went home with last night is really 17 and was here for orientation.. i feel like a pedifile...
In that case, you should probably come up to the union, orientation is in full swing, your kind of guys ;)
cunt.
dude, my face is all kinds of fucked up right now. and don't even start with i told you so...
Is it weird i consider You Sexy Thing our song?
i'm lost and i look like a hooker
Does boxed wine and camel crushes signify a college date? Lets hope so
I bought the tickets, he brought the weed. thanks to you, we had to roll a joint out of my bible paper.
She eyed me up from across the bar and mouthed "I have no gag reflex".
I'm making you a bingo card for hookups of the school year 2011-12 so you can make even worse life decisions next year
Please God, is a penis possibly making it to vagina town to much to ask for tonight.
There was this blissful moment of peace and quiet... then you ran past our window with a lit firecracker in hand going, "SHIT. SHIT. SHIT!"
When we were having sex last night, I told him I would replace him with tacos
You're the third Mark I've fucked in that bed.
I love that my family celebrates every holiday with a joint. Chanukah? Mazel-juana! Easter? What's more spring than the color green? Election day? What better way to celebrate democracy in action than medical pot?
and idk now I have nine bags of lettuce in my fridge
I'm sitting here drinking whisky and listening to The Wiggles, I don't need a social life
Randomize
