you didnt say anything until i brought it up today. i guess i misjudged your maturity.
I guess I misjudged your gender.
He looked like the mexican version of Steve Carrell with a unibrow.
Thanks for getting me home last night.
No worries. I'll always be there for you, just like Mufasa.
apparently I kept yelling at her that I wanted t-Rex sized lines. awesome
All I heard was "You have collect call from Lafayette Parish Jail for Dude it was awesome! I'll tell you about it later!"
Lost my key. Fell asleep on the doorstep and got woken up by host grandma poking me with a broom.
Just successfully invited my mom to a drag show. If that doesnt say "im gay" then idk what will.
i just honestly didn't believe you when you said your brother was a fucking clown. ho shit you weren't kidding.
she basically told me that her vine videos last longer that I do
I'm curious as to what my outfit choices drunk me made for this weekend.
he probably thinks i inited him over to have sex but really i just want to show him 90's music videos
Tried to shave my legs but the rug burn on my knees from last night got in the way.
I can see their wedding vows now: 'Til basicness do us part
My one night stand ended up seeing me the next morning... For my interview. Guess who got a job.
I'M HANGING OUT WITH THE DRUG DEALER UPSTAIRS JUST SO I CAN STEAL HIS WIFI PASSWORD, I HOPE Y'ALL LOVE ME.
Randomize
