you think thats bad? Today I had to pop a zit on my sack.
I either just heard my neighbors having sex or she really agreed with whatever he was talking about.
I mean I'm basically single. Or maybe just an asshole. Either way.
i bought a pregnancy test with dimes. Is that trashy?
They pulled him over whille he had a fish tank full of beer in his front seat. He told them it coudn't count as an open container cause the top was on it.
Drunkenly auctioned off my bed for 3 tequila shots
There are bruises on the top of my foot. The pole won.
I know. She seems like she getting that "need some dick" restlessness. Might explain the feisty attitude
At first i thought she was a sexily dressed toddler. but not in a pedophile way, in a really on drugs way
I don't send those kind of pictures unless the recipient has already been up close and personal with it. I don't give previews, but I will provide recaps.
He just started dry humping the air... I'm done
whatever. i don't need to be drunk to tell you i'd suck your dick if you had one.
You have to give it to him that he fucked me out of the dull weekdays.
The cat was building a spaceship out of the carpet, my legs were cans of tomato sauce, and there was something else in that pot you gave me.
Last time he showed up for Christmas he went on and on about backpacking somewhere and getting ghonnorreah twice.
Randomize
