my mother just offered to pay for my fake id.
Last night I apparently send my boss a picutre of my boobs. On the bonus part I got a raise today. So I just want to thank your parents for naming you Jeff cuz if I was not so hammered last night I would have sent it to the right one.
You're the only chick there. That's not an orgy, that's called a gang bang...
You tried to tip the paramedic for finding you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Remember when I was so high that I thought my appendix burst? All I had to do was fart man, just fart.
OH MY GOD I JUST WANT TO GO HOME AND FART ALL NIGHT.
Just saw an all male dolphin threesome from underwater viewing
she's fucked both of my roommates but not me. i feel like I'm not part of the group anymore
He deserves someone who will touch his penis at 3 a.m.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My date ended with her leaving the bar with that guy who used to jerk off in the back of the school bus.
I don't know where I keep finding these guys, but mi power bottoms es su power bottoms.
So I just saw someone get shoved into a car trunk by your car.
He corrected my spelling during sexting.
Who the fresh hell put 2 pillows a raincoat and a guitar on top of me to keep me warm last night
It's to the point where if a guy can so much as find my clit, I'll consider him amazing in bed
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