If you think im a hippy you should see these girls. They would scissor mother nature if they had the chance.
thanks 4 putting "im not your boyfriend baby" on my sex playlist. she just got pissed and left.
You said that we had to leave the party together and proceeded to repeat the "ducks fly together" speech from The Mighty Ducks word for word. Soon the whole party was quite and started chanting quack..quack...quack..
That poor kid, I literally invited myself over and took advantage of him.
yea I'm sure he was really upset some drunk girl showed up to fuck him.
Do you have to put it that way?
judging by my wet hair I would guess I showered at the bartenders apt last night?
Nope she woke up in a hotel room alone on 55th street. A guy in a lamborgini gave her a ride this morning. She was walking barefoot home
Casually had to file a missing persons report last night
You gotta buy me dinner first. Or smoke me out. Both are equally chivalrous
U touched your head and and said "oh look blood" and then looked at me and touched my face... And said war paint
I opened the door and his girlfriend was standing there; we made silent, prolonged eye contact as I quietly put on my panties and left.
We celebrated our relationship by shotgunning beers on his lawn in our underwear. I may have to marry this man...
Slept at my ex's best friends house while my ex was locked out and I walked by him sleeping in his car this am
Can you come get me? I woke up in the woods behind the Super 8. I have pizza.
Omg my orgasm just made the fucking sun come out. Clearly my libido controls the weather now.
I am sweating Crown. It all went wrong when the ratio hit 50-50
Randomize
