he called to tell me the scratches were still on his back. this was in the summer.. still the best hookup
A donut and a mojito for breakfast...Helloooooo Derby Wekkend!
I say that when we get our grades back we're making a drinking game out of it.
Just saw 30+ dicks. Explain later.
So for a second i just thought clitoris was a disease.
Plus my stomach has been speaking through my ass all day sending notes saying "fuck you" and "this is from your liver" or "i will kill you."
I found a pair a guys underwear in my purse that has a British flag on it and says and I quote "British beef" what.the.fuck.
That sad moment when even your drug dealer lands a summer internship and you don't...
No, this place just freaks me out. Like I feel like ill get pregnant just being here. And all those pregnant bellies. It's weird.
Also CANADIAN LIPS TASTE OF MAPLE SYRUP AND APOLOGIES. SORRY.
Why does 2015 have to start with so many regrets?
My car has a permanent smell of sex to it now.
There's a quesaritto in the oven. Neither of us have been to Taco Bell in 3 weeks.
WHY HAVE SO MANY THING GONE IN MY BUTT ON THIS TRIP
My vagina is the only part of me that is pleased you lived through last night.
Randomize
