Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(214): View more from Texas

so he went down on me and i thought i heard him say "you're smelly" to my vagina

(214): View more from Texas

i got awkward and finally asked him what he said

(214): View more from Texas

he actually said "you want some dick?" to my vagina. which is worse? either way he's talking to it

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(214): so he went down on me and i thought i heard him say "you're smelly" to my vagina (214): i got awkward and finally asked him what he said (214): he actually said "you want some dick?" to my vagina. which is worse? either way he's talking to it http://tfl.nu/s46y

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(314): View more from Missouri

Someones car got stolen, everyone is yelling, and im drunk just sayin yeah buddy over and over again

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(314): Someones car got stolen, everyone is yelling, and im drunk just sayin yeah buddy over and over again http://tfl.nu/jwo1

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(863): View more from Florida

And then she proceeded to fling her bra around while screaming the rocket power theme song, still managing to not fall off the skateboard

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(863): And then she proceeded to fling her bra around while screaming the rocket power theme song, still managing to not fall off the skateboard http://tfl.nu/4drm

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(609): View more from New Jersey

imagine how many guys you'd have sex if you didn't recieve your monthly gift.

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(609): imagine how many guys you'd have sex if you didn't recieve your monthly gift. http://tfl.nu/z6oe

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(603): View more from New Hampshire

Yeah I'm about to go down a waterslide that comes out a 2nd story window. I love college.

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(603): Yeah I'm about to go down a waterslide that comes out a 2nd story window. I love college. http://tfl.nu/nve2

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(419): View more from Ohio

Tuesday night just isn't my ideal coke binge night.

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(419): Tuesday night just isn't my ideal coke binge night. http://tfl.nu/v4wy

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(570): View more from Pennsylvania

someone just drove by blasting livin on a prayer and threw like 6 bagels out the window... was it you?!

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(570): someone just drove by blasting livin on a prayer and threw like 6 bagels out the window... was it you?! http://tfl.nu/6u5e

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(908): View more from New Jersey

We told you to stay put for 2 minutes. We come back out and your being handcuffed yelling "DO YOU FEEL LIKE A GOOD FUCKING PERSON ARRESTING ME ON MY BIRTHDAY?!"

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(908): We told you to stay put for 2 minutes. We come back out and your being handcuffed yelling "DO YOU FEEL LIKE A GOOD FUCKING PERSON ARRESTING ME ON MY BIRTHDAY?!" http://tfl.nu/fs29

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(303): View more from Colorado

I woke up naked in my bathtub at 5:30 this morning. There's legit a spray tan body print of me in the fetal position in my tub.

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(303): I woke up naked in my bathtub at 5:30 this morning. There's legit a spray tan body print of me in the fetal position in my tub. http://tfl.nu/lnap

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(323): View more from California

I think we should bring back the casual nipple tassel

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(323): I think we should bring back the casual nipple tassel http://tfl.nu/ythu

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(503): View more from Oregon

Taco Bell drive through. Chick got out of the car in front of us and threw up on the hood of my car!

(503): View more from Oregon

Not okay.

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(503): Taco Bell drive through. Chick got out of the car in front of us and threw up on the hood of my car! (503): Not okay. http://tfl.nu/moe1

Replies (7) Good night (426) Bad night (1940)
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(832): View more from Houston, Texas

Taking a shit on the side of the road is not how I imagined this morning would start.

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(832): Taking a shit on the side of the road is not how I imagined this morning would start. http://tfl.nu/gyl1

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(513): View more from Ohio

Okay we're getting vodka and coming

(1-513): View more from Ohio

Okay. Joe has my machete attached to his belt

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(513): Okay we're getting vodka and coming (1-513): Okay. Joe has my machete attached to his belt http://tfl.nu/g69k

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(770): View more from Georgia

How many people slept in the bouncy castle last night?

(678): View more from Georgia

4 guys, 1 girl. Pretty sure were gonna have to pay the cleaning fee

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(770): How many people slept in the bouncy castle last night? (678): 4 guys, 1 girl. Pretty sure were gonna have to pay the cleaning fee http://tfl.nu/1zan

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(774): View more from Massachusetts

stop sending me battleship coordinates and get back here so i can suck your dick

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(774): stop sending me battleship coordinates and get back here so i can suck your dick http://tfl.nu/dnwu

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