I shampoo & condition my pubes, sometimes i wish my face was closer so i could rub against it cause it feels like plush
we have to go try and show our tits so we can get ID-free drinks at applebees
We just watched planet earth in marine bio. And our prof told us that was all we were doing on 420
She just got in car wreck. Wreck sex is better than break up sex
i proceeded to stick my hands in his pants while he continued to repeat i have a girlfriend
We could be the people that go there! Shuffleboard n shit. Meet strippers.
You had me at shuffleboard and strippers
It was a group decision to take your pants off. Took a solid 10 minutes. No more skinny jeans while drinking.
She is still a psychotic unstable bitch, and is therefore PERFECT drinking game fodder
Just had an epiphany about how to drink more effectively in the shower. While walking across campus carrying a Franzia bag like Santa
So I got my junk pierced since we've fucked. You should get in on this.
I got a snap of someone jumping off a light pole. Was that you? Please confirm or deny. #onWisconsin
There's a weed, money and oreo filled pinata promised for our party.
I'll keep supplying drugs if you teach me piano.
First time a guy goes down on me and his dog had its head on my knee the whole time. I swear it was judging me.
I told you I couldn't sleep because of the speed and you rolled over and replied "shh. just pretend."
Randomize
