Its not like he dircectly choose a cheeseburger over sex, it was more like I said seductively "I really appreciate this and I'm going to make it up to you anyway I can" and he replied "i want a bacon cheeseburger"
i guess he just knew i was going to sleep with him either way
Bad news is im a slut again. Good news is its with people ive been a slut with before.
The gyno asked how many partners i've had... I said ummmm she goes ok then i'll just put down ten.
Using his name makes it all too personal. I refuse to get attached to this one. This is all about ass. He doesn't get a name.
I can't believe you're trying to guilt me into a blow j because a tornado made you homeless.
Is it working?
Your a horrible friend, i only tried to do the right thing by moving you off the floor.. that was not an invitation to puke all over my bed and attempt to use my dog to mop it up.
You blackout rapped the entire DMX song Party Up last night at karaoke without looking at the screen. Then you Tebowed on stage, hugged a black guy, puked in a garbage can, then left. You deserve a medal.
She kept telling people I wrecked her brain. That high.
By the taste of his semen he isnt vegetarian and therefore lied to me to take me home on a brighter note i stole his fondue set
He somehow pantsed the bouncer and tipped him over before cartwheeling and skipping away? Help me find him.
I could just tape a camera with a live feed to my head & you could check in on me from time to time
My tights ended up on the driveway folded neatly. Any ideas how that happened?
We had sex in his hot tub. Then we saved a mouse that almost drown in his pool. We celebrated our heroism with more sex.
And by not handle it I mean it makes me want to sit on his face
I just had a legitimate orgy. Wearing glowsticks.
Randomize
