I boned her and wore a Freddy mask once. It was pretty lol
Just found a glow stick inside of my vagina..
With the amount of traffic your vagina gets, it was only a matter of time before someone threw a rave there.
i wish we had morning classes together so we can spike our coffee.
I am 100% positive that I have seen a porno that was shot in this bar.
No, he attached a coozie to his crutches so he can carry his beer around the party.
I should have to wear a sign around the rest of the day so everyone knows the shame I feel.
Do you think I can wear the dress I went to jail in with the shoes I went to prom in to the wedding tonight?
I gave his daughter swim lessons and in exchange he sold me an ounce. I feel so accomplished.
I need to stop getting so drunk at bowling
But if you move out who will get drunk with me on the roof and yell at boys?!?
We talked about breaking up, had sex, and in the middle of said sex, talked more about breaking up- best sad day ever
All I remember is an overwhelming desire for chicken nuggets...
Yes, you pinned my brother to the floor by the throat and threatened to slaughter his family if he didn't drive to mcdonalds and get you some.
What are you talking about? Keg stands at wedding are super classy.
Just flash them and yell "JUDGE THESE BITCHES"
Don't come in. My door to my bathroom won't close because of the table and I'm pooping
Classy
Randomize
