So drunk, too bad you don't want this
it's not the walk of shame if you do it in cowboy boots.
I shaved my pubes to make my cock look like it has a lions mane. to surprise the girl that works at the zoo when she comes over.
I closed that bar. Sang every Beatles song in the book. Made Somoan friends.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
at first I thought it was funny, but looking at it now, it screams "dramatic" and "medicated wipes."
You going out tonight?
No I am at the hospital. Throwing up blood is apparently frowned upon.
Congrats on having the best tasting nipple at the bar last night.
He managed to tell me he was blind in one eye and convince me to have sex with him in the same conversation. It's love.
I have to cancel. My sons dad is out of jail unexpectedly and i'm kinda an emotional wreck. P.s. This is not the life I dreamed of as a little girl.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He was so drunk he was throwing the bowling balls into other lanes on purpose. He still beat my high score thought.
Bring enough bail money and little extra for tacos after
Passing out is my livers way of protecting my mind.
alicia just called me and talked to me in "the eternal language of the dinosaurs" and then kind of roared and gurgled. what kind of 4th of july are you guys having?
the boozy kind. is there any other?
I can't tell if my heart is fluttering because I love him... or if it's palpitating from all the coke.
ok first of all what the fuck
Randomize