What should our trivia night team be named?
Define Statutory
Yeah I'm pretty much like lane on gilmore girls except my mom doesn't look so mean all the time.
Now that I'm the boss, there's nobody to yell at me for smelling like a bar in the morning.
What the hell did I do to get youtube to recommend a video for me called "how to increase your chances of getting pregnant"?
You told me that you only walk into walls because it makes the room stop spinning.
She stole my hamster. idk who she was, she just walked in and said she knew Keith so she stayed, drank 6 beers, and then stole Charles.
The two guys from next door helped him do a backflip. The ended up throwing him halfway through a ceiling tile. Don't worry, we fixed it with duct tape.
All I remember from last night is petting the broom with my feet and feeling like I was standing on a horses head
Hypothetically speaking, what is the proper response if one gets bitten by a most likely not rabid squirrel? Hypothetically.
Oh and my new excuse for not being able to hook up is cholera, feel free to use it
At some point tonight the bad ideas in my head became bad decisions that happened outside my head
So apparently after I spilled candle wax down the front of my pants, I went to the store, bought condoms, and passed them out to everyone at the bar.
I thought they were lying to me about the condoms, until I found the receipt in my pocket.
PUT YOUR FRESHLY SHAVED MEXICAN POON ON THAT BEARD. NOW.
You reeked of guilt and shame and we offered you pancakes
Stop leaving buckets of wine at my house.
Randomize
