Sexting assembly today. Fuck yes
let's bang
You're in my phone as 'Weird Bus Guy' so I think my answer's no.
oh, and bring over your fire extinguisher. we're gonna get the mailman again
honey bunches of taint.
someone shit in a solo cup and left it at the base of the stairs. fuck orlando dude.
Outside the community dumpsters: beer bottles and a carton of orange juice. Looks like we were here.
There are bruises on the top of my foot. The pole won.
you dipped you banana in queso last night.
If is anything like my past relationships, I have no doubt that I will single-handedly reignite the Cold War
I almost bumped into a man wrapped only in a blanket at 10 am
I just need a text that says "put that food down bitch" and then maybe I'll lose water weight through tears
You having your own car has severely reduced the amount of blowjobs I get.
Come as you are, bitch. Glitter and vodka provided.
Shelly has the weirdest luck. Dude offered her a job riding a bucking bronco and it was not porn or stripping but an actual g-d cow.
Just fucked my ex's brother. It is clear I dated the wrong one. Is it wrong for me to continue to fuck this one?
Randomize
