He told me I handled myself pretty well considering how drunk I was. He failed to realize that the lollipop I had was one I found on the ground a few minutes before hand.
I just want to point out that nothing makes my hickie/hangover more obvious than sleeping in a scarf and sunglasses. nothing.
the night ended with taco bell and tears
My fridge broke, and apparently the back is missing. The repair guy just fixed it with a pizza box. I didn't ask where the box came from, but it wasn't mine. Reason #20 why rent is cheap.
Just be aware that next year I will probably try to seduce you to avoid going to the gym
The last thing I remember is crying and shaking my head as she was putting salt on my hand. I guess I took the shot
Took three klonopin and turned all my jeans into jorts. I miss you
I AM HANGING OUT WITH ADORABLE DOGS SURROUNDED BY NATURE. GOD BLESS AMERICA AND ALSO BYE CIVILIZATION AND PANTS.
Are you at a park?
I did a kegel this morning to determine if I had been penetrated during last night's blackout. Nope.
We were wearing togas. So having sex was really easy to do without taking any clothes off.
I slept awesome next to you. You're like an electric blanket that I can have morning sex with.
I need you to teach me how to be roommates with somebody I'm not fucking.
Fun. You missed it. Michael broke a door with his erection.
I’m at that point in my trip where I’m kinda hot, kinda cold and I have to remember to breathe.
It wasn't my fault.
You let her suck your neck. Yes it was your fault.
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