i just sat at a stop sign for 10 minutes waiting for it to turn green. i need to STOP SMOKING THIS SHIT.
I just creeped all your pictures on Facebook -- it was like I watched you grow up right before my eyes.
thankjk goddddn taco bell uis open htis lateee!
you do know it's eleven in the afternoon, right?
I woke up with her little sister yelling "she's dead !!" from the bathroom doorway.
Please tell me why there is some girl tied to our toilet?
There is a hole in her door about 2 inch in diameter. You may see me on YouPorn
If I come home tho and find u passed out naked in my bed with the bottle of crown empty, we're gonna have issues.
I'm sorry, I can't help the fact that I like to sleep naked, and I like booze, together it looks bad, yes.
Next time you're baked eat baked beans and potato chips together. Like dip them in the beans. It's so good
I was full on naked standing in his room and I just said "this isn't me" and left.
If you recall, I made a Zoolander reference almost immediately after you pulled out of me the first time we had sex.
...take a good look at your butthole.... then try matching it to any paint color on the Benjamin Moore color wheel....not gonna happen...
Why thank you for your unwanted opinion, person I've never met before.
I broke another vibrator the other day. Abstinence is not for me.
IM HAMMERED AND JUST HAD CHEESECAKE THAT MADE ME FEEL LIKE NO MAN HAS EVER MADE BE FEEL BEFORE.
I want to be her friend more than I want to fuck her boyfriend.
Randomize