My cat gives me a boner
Just bought plan B with a coupon. Told the pharmacist I like to keep it classy.
Every day you talk to me ... I literally love you more..
She should get an extra 30 days for that Georgia Rule movie......terrible.
Im in your car brotha dog. Its was unlocked, so im gonna sleep in it. well i mean i think its your car be your car.
Now that we both have boys can we make up games that objectify them as sex toys?
future-me showed up mid trip and gave us a thumbs up.
did you not get the photos of the finger bruises on my ass?
Admittedly shitfaced... I have two questions. 1)why is the fan in my bathroom on? (Sub-text: is there a ghost?). 2) is your underwear really argyle?
I just gave parenting advice and had a discussion about the distribution of wealth in america...in a bar. I'm starting to think its me and not you lol
I'm only wearing socks and eating tuna, don't do this to me right now.
I want to sit on top of her nipple mountains and reenact the Ricola commercial.
That cat I follow on Facebook beat cancer so we're drinking tonight in celebration
We'd like to invite you to our threesome! Lingerie is encouraged and drinks will be provided. Next Friday, roommate night, my bedroom. Hope to see you there!
sending my old camp counselor nudes. childhood memory win or new low?
She told me the next morning I stared at her tits for like 15 minutes with binoculars from only a few seats away.
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