we went to that german restaurant and drank out of the boots. Then I threw up into one
all i remember is you climbed in a garbage can and said you were trashed
Would it be too much if i wore depends to new moon so i dont miss any of it?
is the shake weight an appropriate valentine's day present?
Defiantly just threw away our yearly bottle collection in front of the campus tour. The school should pay me for recruitment
Absence makes the cock grow harder.
Just found a note from Saturday that says "rainy soft hair".... Any ideas?
Okay so my USC tutor just offered to eat me out. I think I'm definitely applying to USC.
SOMEONE WITH THE TWITTER HANDLE "METHLAB" FAVORITED THAT PICTURE
I made out with a guy because he ate a grape lollipop and he tasted delicious... not my proudest moment.
I hooked up with a guy that had a beard last night felt like I was building a fucken log cabin
And at the semi-adult age of 25 I have shit my pants. Not even drunk, just really late to work. Is this real life?
IDK MAYBE BC I WOKE UP IN AN AIRPORT WITH A ONE WAY TICKET TO LONDON
Bitch how dare you drink my dos equis
Be careful, there is sex in the air.
Randomize