dude...i just woke up in ****'s bed!
doesn't he have a girlfriend???
yeah...who do you think woke us up...
i need to break up with him. i realized this while i was making a mental grocery list while we were having sex. this is not the first time i've done that.
I think she's a little more wasted than usual. She just crawled on the floor to tell mom it was time to take a shot.
Listen, it's not like I meant to bust the window out. It just sort of happened. And I'm also sorry for stealing your dads bandanas.
I've decided I'm peeing in a solo cup then throwing it on his windshield. It's official. He called the cops 4 times in our first week at the house. He deserves it, right?
It was like being fucked by the god of thunder, he gained power from the storm. I took a Plan B because I don't think regular birth control will stop Thor's sperm.
We can't be fuck buddies. You stare into my eyes while we fuck.
i told him I'd let him eat part of a weed cookie out of my cleavage, so he pulled over like a gentleman.
Is your gma going to be okay with me passed out drunk on the ground
Just had my very first high conversation with mom
And you survived it! I'd say that earns you a "Blaze It Like a Real Adult" from the Grown-up Girl Scouts
Congrats! Its a fuck boy!
Would it be weird if i sent him a "happy fuckiversary" text?
My mom heard me having sex with my boyfriend but thought it was the neighbors. She commented on how quick it was. I just nodded and changed the subject
as a self proclaimed hoe im ok with a lotta things but that is not fucking one of them
its 8 and I'm HUNGOVER!! how is that possible??
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