how do you clear previous safari searches on an iPhone? i asked my brother to google something for me and "big penis" "empire chinese food" and "reverse cowgirl" popped up.
I thought I hit my peak drinking in college. Just finished first day on Wall Street. College was nothing.
Her parties are sponsored by Valtrex. This might not be your best idea.
We all know tonight is going to end like every other night with you. drunk, pantless and confused. Dont try to switch things up.
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Also I climbed atop a mailbox with a toilet paper hat and a wolverine claw made of glowsticks, screaming at passers-by that they were going to die. Control me
I mass texted 4 of you for a booty call. Please reply all when responding so only one of you shows up. Last one is a rotten egg.
I thought that wasn't a thing ever since she showed you her vag on the dance floor
I was stopped at a light on my way home and a priest threw holy water on my car. Seems fitting after last night.
He may not be fully over his current wife yet. But wait until I show him my tits in his office at the end of the day tonight.
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he has a party story that rivals our "PTSD- soldier-with-a-knife" party story. I'm pretty sure this is part of some prophecy.
Is it bad that I recognize every dick in your dic pic collection?
I'll pretend I don't know she's blind, my morals claimed the back seat in this adventure.
I don't think you understand...I'm really good at getting drunk
I mean really am I setting up a snapchat when I'm 40 so I can send nudes to my 23 yr old bf? yes, yes I am. Where is my life heading.
Just had a flashback of scottish man yellin' at my face. What the fuck I did?