My sheets at my parents place are clean. No braveheart but I can paint myself, yell "freedom", and sword fight you with my cock. So come over.
You hook up with other guys, let him talk to other girls.
no
No, asshole. I'm not gay. But if I was I think I would do better than fucking Nick Lachey.
I don't apprectiate you insinuating that my breasts have a sort of bremuda triangle effect
We are so drunk I just let him piss between my legs on the toilet. That's love.
I HAVE FLAVORED BLOW. THIS SHOULD NOT EXISIT.
He's currently rapping every word to 'more money more problems' at what could be a over 30s gay bar. I'm not sure yet. More info to come.
WHYAREWHITEGUYSSOBADINBED?! What the fuck went wrong, evolution?
Come over. I'll eat you out and we'll make bacon.
best text I've received ever.
Guy just came in wearing only shorts, on his hand was written - my name is ... Call ... And tell them where i am, thanx - in permanent marker, ordered his favorite dish, and left w/out touching it. It's snowing outside.
That shot was terrible
You were like one of those guys at carnivals that spit out fire..... Except it was throw up
It was like in the Christmas carol when the guy pulls his robe back and 2 small children appear... except this time it was a massive scrotum
and i do believe that will be the last time you send me a photograph of our mother in her underwear.
I might as well just sew it shut at this point.
Sooooooo, maybe just fucked on a motorcycle.
Randomize
