have fun at tinkers! p.s. are there any hot guys who look like they wanna wait until marriage to have sex?
69 |D_O
wtf does that mean??
it's a very specialized emoticon, means 'i heard you fucking some dude through my bedroom wall last night and so i listened intently"
I know. I just don't want anything else. I have no other desire. Just a ham sandwich.
I honestly don't know what to make of that.
A ham sandwich would be nice.
apparently you can't crawl through the drive-thru window
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They showed a guy on tv in a Brady jersey and a sweatpants boner when the NE offense took the field. They didn't show his face. I hope that wasn't you.
He gave me one look and told me I'm not allowed to board the plane if I'm still as drunk by departure time.
I've gotten 2 singers numbers, a 6'5 dude has promised to take me to Oktoberfest, and I spent the night w a pilot named Zeus who looks like caramel tastes. Also I sprained my thumb punching some guy I named 'hater'. I love Nashville
My mom just added me on Facebook... She has one like and it's Will Smith
what better way to celebrate the birth of jesus christ than to get embarrassingly intoxicated and make poor decisions!?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just wanna get drunk in a castle. Is that so much to ask?
Did I send you a drunk selfie with a pine tree last night?
tinder day one and i already had more guys message me about "the girl with the big tits in my second picture" than about me. MY 17 YEAR OLD SISTER CAN GET LAID WITHOUT EVEN HAVING TO MAKING A PROFILE
to be fair she does have a great rack
I wrote notes to myself all over my body. "don't yell at cops again" "Cody stole your phone" "you kissed Cody" "vodka shots are bad for your liver" and "cactus pretty" WTF????
u would mumble something and then get unnecessarily loud and say random shit like 'id fuck the shit out of taylor hanson right now'
my favorite sex position is the one where no sex actually happens we just get really stoned and eat a lot and watch netflix in the dark
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