Whiskey dick.
Yea dude! Love it. Hate it. Have it.
Everyday of my life.
hahah your definitly as dumb as I think I thought you are. boom roasted.
he keeps calling me but I'm too scared to answer... Not sure what he's gonna yell at me for: barging into his room while he was with another girl, filling her shoes with dog food and water, or hiding his keys in the garbage disposal.....
The best part of listening to lady gaga while high is that any word your brain puts in is right.
So basically he tried to get out of the car and crawl on the highway with the broken leg because he didn't want to go to the hospital. It was not a good time...then we got pizza though.
Please tell me why there is some girl tied to our toilet?
I don't remember anything that happened last night past 10.. I made him buy me a Buckeye's Donut tshirt. I have no idea why he'd want to fuck me after that.
If I had cancer, and got to make a wish, id make the organization force your dad to fuck me.
That moment when you see yourself in a security camera feed and realize you forgot a bra. And pants.
I've now spilled wine and got poptarts all over my cast. So much for my doc taking me seriously...
My vagina needs her own mother sometimes.
Giving the guy pizza was a good idea. Leaving him naked on the pool table makes you my hero
Went home w the NY Islander in a NY Rangers jersey, needless to say he was pissed
How many Wendy's frosties do you think it would take to fill a bathtub?
outside on the street drinkin, walked into a random house and asked to pee, some kid hands me a beer and says i have to chug it first
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