You know im sick of people that are still obsessed w obama. that was sooooo last year
Girl next to me in class just said to her friend "and I haven't even cried yet." Challenge accepted
Hes the only one i know who can talk to a girl for an entire hour abuot the science in starwars and still get laid.
Paying 5 grand for boobs is saving me like 10 grand in weed
dude she looked like Newman from Seinfeld I'm done with this wingman shit
You chanted SOFA PIZZA all night then we woke up to find about ten slices under the cushions where you were sleeping....
He's grinding topless with a group of girls to that discovery channel song. May I take a message?
You're married and I'm going to make out with a stranger tonight. Isn't that weird? It's like a gap in the time space continium.
The airport has the best people watching and munches... It should be a destination drinking location
He was making Jim beam nachos. Chips soaked in whiskey with cheese
I emailed the police apartment to apologize to the officer from last night. I practically threw a hissy fit because he wouldn't hug me.
It was "against protocol"
yeah, never be friends with someone with shitty eyebrows.. they obviously already make poor life choices
I ripped off the screen and literally supermaned through my bedroom window. That wasted
I like your optimism Chelsea but I'm not about getting my salad tossed
I was totes going to lose it to him last night, but I cried and we ate mexican food instead.
Randomize