Just had to reach into my sister's bag and shut off her vibrator so my parents wouldn't hear it. I am the world's greatest brother.
She was sucking his dick at Seacrets outside bar in front of all of us...her friends kept coming over crying and yelling "Tiffany stop it"
i have a feeling he has a nice dick. i can just sense it.
if i actually bought condoms for every time i had sex, i could single handedly fix the economy
his mom gave me my lost underwear folded up along with the rest of my christmas present. tell me this cannot be happening.
This is how I ended up being the slutty friend isn't it?
Hate to say it and even though I definitely have a biased opinion but I'm surprised your not, sleeping with anyone else. Good personality, charisma and amazing in the sack.
Feel free to use me as a reference.
He's grinding topless with a group of girls to that discovery channel song. May I take a message?
Yeah then she waddled like a duck in silence sat down and ate the entire paper towel roll.
Considering that your "hello" was replaced with "Fuck yo couch," I'm not surprised that you have a black eye.
He texts me "just to say hi" and then tells me how hard he is and sends me a dick pic. And I'm like, dude, I'm ordering a burrito right now
I say I'm working from home on conference call days, but really I just mute the phone, put that shit on speaker so I can hear what's going on, and let Marcus fuck my brains out.
I'm 22 and I'm drinking hawaiian punch from a sippy cup. Everything is right in the world.
If you're gonna show up unannounced on hangover day, you better have coffee doughnuts and a boner
is it bad that im laying on a beach towel in my room with my lights on high pretending to be tanning on the beach in the summer?
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