What kind of poor, pathetic town do we live in where a horny teenage girl is sitting in her basement on a saturday night, unlaid?
no, its his 'welcome back from rehab' party.
so today I found out that she used to be a he....
are you gonna get a divorce?
My roommate still talks on AIM. What is this middle school?
I just watched a girl use a tall boy Coors as a rolling pin to make christmas cookies
he ran me a hot bath. i thought i was in a pot and was going to be eaten. i was strangely ok with this
I am not old enough to be running into past fucks at the bank. This is at least a twenty five year old milestone.
I also referred to her clitorous as her "vagina dot" last night...probably going to be dumped soon.
Im the proud new owner of the campus speed bump sign
I woke up in my living room, on the floor, wearing nothing but a fur coat?
I swear she looks like a sloth.... I'll toss a coin...
So i know i said I'm turning over a new leaf, but i met a guy with a dick piercing. I have to sleep with him. For science.
After I asked for my 6th Gin & Tonic, the look on the flight attendant's face started to make me feel bad about myself.
You don't understand. This boy has the Mona Lisa of cocks.
Don't ask but i need a priest, a calzone, a litre of gravy, and exactly 7 oreos
And a bag of nachos
Randomize
