Just figured out how to smoke weed with a toaster.
Her vagina was like a man-sized safe.
a girl in my class is on a twilight fan site and running her fingers on the screen as edwards body comes up.
Im rethinking drunk tuesdays. Also rethinking ovaries.
Get dressed up for her? please, I could shit my pants and she would still blow me
We learned a valuable lesson from last night. You can, in fact, order bacon on a Big Mac.
and unfortunately for you, hallmark doesnt make a "sorry i was getting a blowie in the backseat of your car while you were driving, projectiled my jizz onto your hand, and caused you to crash" card
The glockenspiel player has some booze though so hopefully the ride won't be that bad
The original plan involved fireworks and a lot more dildos but the new one is still okay.
making my breakfast out of the pot brownies we made last night. Safe to say it's time to go grocery shopping.
Visions of polite missionary are dancing in my head right now kinda and it alarms me
Jus had a dream that I borrowed bob dylans car to save us from a pack of raptors. Pretty stoked about it.
How much of a thot would I be if I put this pic up? On a scale of thot-ish to Queen of Thotlandia
Get your dick back in here. On Saturdays, you're not allowed to leave my bed unless it's to make me bacon or coffee.
Did we go to Florida? My missing thong and DL just arrived in the mail. Return address was Tampa.
Randomize
