she has no idea who harrison ford is.
see that's why i'd never date someone born in the 90s
you made me watch la bamba, and then you yelled at me for disrespecting your mexican heritage.
I was amazed that you fell flat on your ass and still managed not to spill them drinks in your hands. Your getting good at this.
I love girls that fake tan. Can you say p p p p p p p p pumpkin face
I walk in to see her roommate half naked on their stripper pole. I knew I was home.
We've only been driving for two hours and I'm already down 3 vicodin...I'm not going to survive this family vacation.
and hes going back to rehab like me, so we have common interests
he does have a point though, watching you drink makes me never want to drink again
It's hard being an adult. And by that I mean it's hard to tell the boy you like who rejected you that you can't share a room with him at white party because you don't want to see him bang other boys.
Dressing as mugato from zoolander Halloween you may want to be the hand model. We can get you a fish bowl filled with Clementine Vodka and soda you can put your hand in.
How do you say "thats kinda illegal" in thai?
high moment I think I just reached personal nirvana
I basically have the attention span of a ferret on meth when it comes to men
I shoulda been born a dude. There's too much power in a vagina.
YOU FUCKED THE DARE INSTRUCTOR DIDN'T YOU?
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