so the sex was amazing up until the point where she said "wow, you're even better than your dad!"
This is much more drunk than i was intending for a wednesday
dude. how can brian from family drink at fucking bars? he's a dog and definitaly doesn't have pockets.
what is with people arguing over soda or pop? to be honest i thought it was just called chaser
The last thing I remember is funneling tequila out of a pink noodle.
the only thing i remember last nigh is talking to some chick for thirty minutes about cheese.
Wow. He pulled out his dick and I swear I heard a thud from it hitting the floor.
She was indeed spoonfeeding you potato salad out of that giant bowl with a giant spoon. Dont feel special, she was giving it to everyone that left the bar.
i just like, need to vent to someone
Can we skip the part where I pretend to care and fast forward to the appreciative blowjob from you?
I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but a penn state hat. We are....
So I'm going to regale you with a tale of someone who went out, was fed way to many shots, got super wasted and now has a date with one of the security guards from the building but has no idea what his name is. That someone is me
Talking to him sober hurts my brain
i don't know man... i just want to listen to John Lennon every time i finish fucking her. is this love?
I've seen too many naked penises for this to be a normal Monday morning
this poor kid thinks hes going to have his first time with both of us
Randomize