I mean I'm forever immortalized as the one who puked in his dad's straw hat.
You had a towel around you and you called it your shot bib.
bleeding from the face, sitting in a shopping cart and holding a wad of ripped caution tape. what else would i be doing?
At what point would you like us to save you from yourself?
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I think online classes were designed around the concept of day drinking.
nobody understands how my tooth became embedded in the ceiling last night.
he fell asleep like an hour after we got to the beach, he deserved that penis shaped sunburn.
And if you ever tell anyone that I have emotions ill kill you
The bottle of Wild Turkey is empty and there is a pile of wet cement in the garage. What happened?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She told me she brought a guy home but that he looked pickled. And no, that's not an autocorrect.
Hahahah pickled
I asked her what she meant and she said that he looked like he had soaked in water.
I understand, but unless there is an intervention for me being planned, i DON NOT want to talk about my life choices
How many times have we said we'd stop taking Jell-O shots with strangers?
WEED BROWNIES! He put weed in my brownie mix! And he got it from YYYYOOOOUUUU!
Look at the bright side mom. After 20 years dad is still capable of surprising you!
Shut up Max.
I have finally found someone I enjoy for reasons that do not necessarily include his dick
I could not add him. He gets 5 likes on Instagram.
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